Tuesday, April 16, 2013

The Car Horn

The image below depicts a car horn.

driver-honking-a-car612x344 (2)I do not own this image.

Car horns play a major part of the daily life in the city. The loud blaring sound emitted by these devices dominate the environment; mainly around the Suva bus stand.

95% of motorists who use them are a-holes while the other 5% accounts for the use of motor horns to signal trouble and for traffic purposes.

According to the Conball University, the word "horn" was derived from the colloquial English term "horny" where studies have shown that the car horn is culturally used as a mating call when an attractive member of the opposite sex appears by the road side. This is optionally followed by either a howl or whistle by the horn user.

The horn has proven to be the most unsuccessful courting ritual existent among all other human cultures of the world. This can be attributed to the suddenness of the loud beep that the car-horn admits or the pervy shit-eating-grin held by the horn user.

In other cultures, the car-horn is a means of time-travel. The car-horn is called upon when the horn user is late to his/her destination. It is also used in traffic-jams to magically transport horn users to their destination faster.

These two uses listed above purport to the 95% of horn users.

5% of horn users use the horn as a means of warning to other motorists in case of a traffic violation or road incidents.